So I've been feeling down lately. Seriously down. Like...Underworld level down. It's hard to describe but basically, everything irritates me and I just want to burn stuff down. Committing arson would be to put it in simpler terms.

Maybe I'm not sleeping enough? Or maybe I'm "turning into a werewolf" again what with the moon and stuff... I've always been a cynical person. But believe me when I say, this past week has indeed been crass.

We started coursework in science. Our experiment fails. Badly. I buddied up with the new girl. I like her a lot. It's just that sometimes I can't really understand her English. Oh, and R. Collins is an asshole.

Anyway, we're studying the reaction rates of hydrochloric acid and sodiumthiosulphate with different concentrations of hydrochloric acid. That's when the problems arose. First three experiments were okay. The concentration levels were fairly close, so small changes were okay. The fourth experiment involved an acid concentration that was half of the first. From my knowledge, reaction time should take much longer. It was the same as the previous ones. In fact, it didn't matter what acid concentrations we used, the reaction rates were always the same. They shouldn't have been. We went to the teacher for help. He confirmed, it's the acid. We tried to cope with it for another day. The results were even faster (and wronger). We were told to dilute the thiosulphate instead. It's not a bad idea except for the fact that we are now about 2-3 days behind everyone else, and my partner's not the most equipment-savvy person. -sigh- I hate being behind. -Throws florence flask at wall-

My German class has finally started assimilating the German assistant. My teacher has finally arranged some sessions for me at my level, seeing as I've done my GCSE a year early (and got an A*) and pretty much do nothing in class. I'm looking forward to doing something German-related. But I'm not sure about the assistant. She makes for awkward silences the few times I've spoken with her. I seriously doubt that I'll be able to "bond" with her the way I did with last year's assistant...

I'm really beginning to wonder about the circumstances under which my mother had the two abortions before my existence. I'm pro-choice all the way, but a part of me is incessantly curious about those two bundles of cells that could've prevented my own existence. I also think my mother should've gone ahead and aborted me, too. I mean hey, she's already had two, what's another one? That was very insensitive and (along with being flamed by potential readers)I'm probably going to feel bad about it later. But I never consented to my existence and as ungrateful as it sounds, that is truly how I feel. I'm not on good terms with the mother at the moment.

Some stuff went down in my social life. I don't want to talk about it at this time (though I'm definetly going to rant about related stuff in the future - mainly on this annoying feature that I've noticed in most social circles here). I get the feeling that people hate me. Oh well.

Did I mention that I totally despise no uniform days? My school arranges these days where in exchange for £1, students are allowed to not wear their uniform to school. Of course, makeup and jewellery is still banned (which in my opinion is a dampener). The money is donated to charity. Taking part is technically voluntary, except the school makes it feel like it's compulsory. I find that this just takes all the goodwill out of doing something charitable.

I can't really think of anything else to put here. I'm feeling a bit uncomfortable going into such detail about my shit week (it goes against my "don't-annoy-people-by-whining" policy) so I think I'm going to end on a slightly more "postive" note.

I've started reading Girl With a One-Track Mind. It's a sex blog. The sort that I read with my hands in front of my eyes peeking from between my fingers and then feel vaguely dirty about afterwards. And this is coming from someone leading a pleasantly asexual life. Meh

-S.M.

PS. Can anyone actually see the Homicidal smiley?